Alastair Cook has completed his ninth test ton, and his first in England for two years, in the match against the “rather be anywhere else” West Indies at Chester-le-Street.

He is partnered by Ravi Bopara who has 79 to his name, and has combined with his Essex colleague in a partnership of 166 (at time of writing).

So No Ton Cook now needs to turn himself into Big Ton Cook. I think his highest score in England is 127 (without checking) and his highest test score was made on that buffet day at Bridgetown. Go out and nab yourself a large ton against a team who’s leader has said he doesn’t really care about all this.