“Start The Car”

England – We are at home. 20/20s coming home. Its coming home. We can win it. If we play how we know we can, we can win it. We are at home, where we are dead good. We can win it.

Australia – We pick players with no first class experience, our best players bunked off the IPL, we are playing an Ashes series later in the summer, and we are really, really, really, really taking this seriously. Can we go now?

India – We hated 20/20. It was not pure cricket. It was a poor form of the game. We have no interest. Then we won the World 20/20. World Domination is ours!!!!!

Pakistan – Are we allowed to play?

New Zealand – Workmanlike, resistant, fighters, dogged, punches above their weight. And that’s just Jesse Ryder.

South Africa – We treat every game of cricket as a laugh. Our earnestness and rigour disguises what a fun team we can be. Did I mention we’ve not won a world cup yet?

West Indies – Chris Gayle Hearts 20/20.

Sri Lanka – In all seriousness, for once, I hope this return to international cricket is a path back to some normality. Jesus, imagine being caught up in that Lahore business….

Zimbabwe – Everything is good now. Can we come back to test cricket please. We’ve given Morgan a job, you know. it is really important as thirteenth deputy despot.

Bangladesh – We will win a decent test in the next few years, promise. But we are much better at this form… Really we are.

Also Rans – Why?

Readers may discern that I don’t really care about this old nonsense, but I will endeavour to watch some of it if the mood takes me.

Graham Gooch reacts to England’s travails in Bridgetown by saying he’s concerned about the quality of test wickets around the world, where run gathering is now de rigeur and big scores barely catch the eye, unless an England player manages one, which is not common.

I input into cricinfo’s statguru a query. Show me the highest innings since January 2004 to today.

Since 2004 we have had 15 scores over 250. Between 1970 and 1995 – 25 years instead of 5 years – there were 18 scores of 250 or over. I know the volume of test cricket has risen a lot but we haven’t crammed 5 into 25 as far as I know and the regularity of big scores is just frightening. 6 of the record 10 wicket partnerships have been set in the past 13 years – the 1st (Dravid/Sehwag), 2nd (Jayasuriya/Mahanama), 3rd (Sangakkara/Jaywardene – a partnership of 624!), 4th (Jayawardene/Samaraweera last week), 8th (Wasim Akram/Saqlain Mushtaq) and 9th (Boucher/Symcox) – in addition the 10th has been equalled in that time too (Azhar Mahmood/Mushtaq Ahmed). Records are made to be broken, but note the best team in the last 20 years hasn’t set a single one of them – they were too busy concentrating on winning games to care! 

Since 2004 there have been just 7 instances of 8 wicket innings by a bowler, and one of those was Krejza’s 8 for 215 in a run feast. In the same period as above, there were 36 instances of 8 wicket innings by bowlers.

Today Thilan Samaraweera scored his second consecutive test double century in the first innings of a match. A test double century should be the highlight of a career, not a norm, and to do it back-to-back should be an astounding feat. He became the 6th player to do it, and the 8th time it has happened. It has previously been achieved by all-time greats like Wally Hammond and Don Bradman. In recent times, though, the additions are less stellar. Vinod Kambli is hardly up there with the greats, and he had England’s wretched 1993 team and the Zimbabwe popguns to milk. Graeme Smith did it in England in 2002, with massive double ton (250 plus both times) at Edgbaston and Lord’s, and to be fair, the second was a matchwinner (might not have been if Insane had caught him), while the other is Sangakkara who did it against Bangladesh, so it really should not count (Hammond and Bradman did it twice, for the record).

Records on the batting side are being notched up at a rate of knots. Bowlers see an acceptable average now of not under 25, but under 30. Spinners are often looking at averages under 40 as being acceptable. If you don’t bowl express pace, or are a freak in terms of accuracy as McGrath was, then you are just cannon fodder. The Kookaburra ball does fuck all after 10 overs and you have to hope for mental errors to get wickets. On flat roads such as Bridgetown, Karachi, et al, you get massive scores. What’s Kamran Akmal doing topping 150? What’s Dinesh Ramdin doing getting 166? Dilshan has three tons already this year and it is only the 2nd March. Sarwan is looking like Bradman. Strauss is looking like he’s back to the days of four years ago, but is that because he’s batted on featherbeds or is it a real revival?

I remember watching Gooch’s 333 in 1990 and thinking that this was a once in a lifetime thing – to see a test player make a triple ton. I have seen since a county 300 in the flesh (Ramprakash), 2 of England’s double tons (Tres and Collingwood) and on the wires players like Sehwag, with a technique so flawed it is laughable, notching up two triple hundreds at a run-a-ball on pitches with aboslutely no threat to him. Dravid is called the wall because on lifeless strips, and with his nigh on impeccable technique, he could be impossible to get out. There’s no skill. Flat pitches, useless cricket balls, and hi-tec bats have weighed the game too much in favour of the batsmen. Great pacemen will soon be a thing of the past.

Oh dear. Moan over.

Don’t Make Me Laugh!!!!!

This has been going on too long. Peter Chingoka is part of a regime currently presiding over a country where they have just issued a 100 trillion dollar note. A country where the Weimar Republic is envious at the number of zeros on the inflation figure. A country that is in wrack and ruin, and one where the cricket authority is a direct adjunct of the government, and where the leaders rob and pillage the game blind for personal enrichment without being held to account.

Good on Australia in following England and refusing him access. Neither of us want to play this regime, and yet they still linger around, giving Bangladesh a game every now and then. The ICC want to pressure governments into letting this odious man in, but were all too keen to back an odious South African regime’s exclusion from the game.

I make no further comment. I have no issue with the players of Zimbabwe. Tatenda Taibu always looked a great talent, and others in the team are really not known because we don’t see them. I’m sure there is some talent there, but all the while their senile leader acts like Africa’s Chairman Mao, but without the resources, they can’t be allowed to play and we should say so. I know we can pick out all sorts of odious regimes we could, or should, ignore, but that doesn’t make it wrong to do so to Zimbabwe.

Enough of the politics. I thought that ICC stood for India Controls Cricket, so what do I know? All the while Chingoka is there, India has another stooge to vote its way. Isn’t expediency lovely…..

It has all gone rather quiet as England prepare for their upcoming tour of the West Indies, but not that quiet that Andrew Flintoff can put his hand up and say he was one of those in favour of Peter Moores. After saying last week that he wanted KP to stay as captain, he now has it both ways by saying that he had a high regard for Peter Moores and that the players should take responsibility for the recent results that England has endured.

Taken from a well-known cricket site is the following..

As a senior member of the team, Flintoff’s opinion was considered to be key as Hugh Morris, the managing director of England cricket, investigated the falling out between captain and coach. “We had a sense of what was happening out in India and the one thing with Kevin [Pietersen], which I’ve said to him, was: ‘As a captain, as a player, I’ll support you’,” Flintoff told the Observer. “The way I played proves that. I played for Kevin as I did for Vaughany [Michael Vaughan] or Nasser [Hussain] or whoever it may be. I didn’t want him to finish. I thought he could have given himself time to grow into the role.

“But on the flip-side I couldn’t support him in not having the coach there, because I had a good relationship with Peter Moores, and I was open about that with Kevin, with Mooresy and Hugh [Morris].”

Flintoff felt the players had to take responsibility for the recent reverses. “We don’t want to get into the football scenario where the team gets beat and the manager gets sacked,” he said. “As players we’ve got everything at our disposal, we’ve got the coaches and we’ve got everything we need to perform. We’ve got to take some responsibility. To be fair to Mooresy the one thing he’s kept is his dignity. Because he’s a good man. He is a good man.”

While your humble Dmitri applauds much of this sentiment, and that too many times coaches are chucked out for the failings of their players, it seems to me that sometimes that 1% difference that might make all the difference can come from those intangibles that a coach produces. How is it that India are now on the ascendant having ditched Greg Chappell and installed a new, more low-profile but utterly single-minded coach like Gary Kirsten. There is no wailing and gnashing of teeth over him in charge. Together with MS Dhoni, they’ve weathered the loss of Anil Kumble and Sourav Ganguly, carried Rahul Dravid and face up to the prospect of losing Sachin Tendulkar and VVS Laxman (as well as Dravid) in the not too distant future. While Kirsten has been in charge we’ve seen Gautem Gambir become a top class opening bat and Zaheer Khan become a feared opening bowler. Is that down to the coach and his staff, or the mere desire of a player to become better?

So while Peter Moores may have had all his coaching badges, he certainly didn’t seem to improve anyone the way Duncan Fletcher did. I keep hearing that certain players didn’t get on with Fletcher, which is rich, given that in the main he picked them all for the team for the first time and that the likes of Harmison, Jones, Trescothick, Vaughan and yes, Kevin Pietersen, were identified as major talents that others may not have punted on. All Moores appears to have done has regressed Panesar, making him innocuous, and not done anything about the perennial failures of certain batsmen up the order, no names mentioned. So yes, Freddie, the players should take some of the blame for it, but that’s assuming they are the men for the job. I’m not sure some of them are.

What it also clearly indicates that although not the king any more, Flintoff has a key role as the kingmaker. This is extraordinary. Let us get one thing straight here – in an ideal world Andrew Flintoff’s batting average should make him a number 7 batsman. His batting average is 32.23, which is awful for a test number 6, while his bowling average of 32.12 isn’t really something to write home about. In someone not as large as life as Freddie, and without those outbursts of furious pace in his bowling to sway opinion, the label “bits and pieces cricketer” could reasonably apply and his views not taken as gospel. Look, I’m not saying he is that, and he’d walk into my England team, but as a bowling all-rounder at 7 or 8, and not at number 6 where ideally, I’d like a test-class batsman who could bowl 7 or 8 overs a day and not let anyone down. How about Paul Collingwood? Try it. Please. See how it works. You need Flintoff and Pietersen in your side for this team to go anywhere, and to use one against the other, as the ECB appear to have done is short-sighted. Oh well, they all leave on Wednesday for the West Indies where everyone takes it for granted we’ll win. I’m nowhere near as sure.

On the international scene this weekend, Australia levelled the series in Hobart, in a game I haven’t managed to catch up with the highlights of yet. I did watch the first couple of hours of Aussie’s innings, where Bill Lawry exclaimed when Australia were going well at 130 for 1 that 300 was on the cards. What dear old Bill doesn’t realise is that they don’t have Clarke, Symonds, a Waugh twin, or a Gilchrist batting for them now, but an out of form Incredible Shrinking Average, his untried brother, and other assorted fill-ins. It isn’t a team in form any more and once Ponting got out, the prospect of big numbers fades. Marsh soon lost his wicket, the team lost their way and Australia posted what looked like a disappointing total of 249/9. I am not sure how this total was enough, given South Africa did not lose all their wickets, but fingers may be pointed at Kallis (72 in 96, but that would be harsh) or the slow start by the openers. However the key inference from reporters is that the slow start was built upon too steadily meaning the last few overs needed to be frantic. South Africa fell six short. Shaun Marsh, showing the usual Australian man-of-the-match awarding skills was given the gong. Ponting’s innings, scored at a quicker pace, may well have been the better one.

In Mirpur, where the pitch appears to be getting worse with age, Zimbabwe beat Sri Lanka again, this time in a thrilling finish. In a game which saw 97.3 overs bowled, the two teams combined for 251 runs for 18 wickets, with six needed off the last by Zimbabwe to win. Ray Price hit the first two balls of the last over for four to take the visitors home. What is going on at this ground? 200 is like 350 there, and even low 100 scores are competitive. Raqibul Hasan, with 28, was the best score on either side. I think the authorities had better review their fixtures at Mirpur if they want runs. However, most of the games have been close, so what is better? For the punters to decide. It was Price’s day as he took 4 for 22 and this add to his match-winning knock after Zimbabwe fell to 92/8 in pursuit of their small total.

Sri Lanka travel to Pakistan for some rare international cricket in that country – the first game is tomorrow. Not a lot of people remember Pakistan’s last test match, so their return is good in the country with so much political upheaval. It is a great shame the team does not include the great Mohammed Yousuf, for political more than cricketing reasons. This ICL nonsense has to be ended, because no team should be forced not to choose someone for pursuing cricketing recompense when his own country has so little international cricket. Certainly not a legend like Yousuf.

I’ll start with my three contenders for Player of the Week first.

Martin Guptill for his century on debut for New Zealand and a well made 40 odd in the series clincher.

Chris Gayle for his imperious knock at Napier, even in a losing cause.

Rohit Sharma for his century in both innings in the Ranji Trophy final – the key man in Mumbai’s 38th triumph.

So to the weekend round-up, and I’ll come to the results at the end of this piece. Test matches have been put to rest for the time being, so the one day circus revolves around the globe. In Bangladesh the home country overcame a defeat by Zimbabwe to still make the final after defeating Sri Lanka, and indeed looked set to hoist whatever trophy they were playing for before Murali’s miracle. Australia are hosting the second ODI against South Africa in Hobart as I write, having lost the first and won the two preceding 20/20 internationals. The ODI in Melbourne was a pulsating clash and these two are playing exciting, competitive cricket. New Zealand won a rain-affected ODI series in Napier to win 2-1, but this was a Duckworth Lewis victory which spolied what looked like an exciting conclusion in the offing.

England’s Under 19s levelled their five match Youth ODI series in Paarl with a 13 run success in Game 4. Highly touted Sam Northeast top scored for England with 68, and left arm spinner Liam Dawson took three wickets. All in for the decider.

On the search for run scorers around the globe, Ijaz Ahmed, not to be confused with the experienced pro of the 80s and 90s, made 229 not out for Faisalabad against Quetta in the Pakistani domestic championship. Ijaz played two tests in 1995 and falls into the veteran category! Yasir Arafat, Kent and Sussex’s finest, took 7 for 45 for the brilliantly name team Khan Research Laboratories in a match against the similarly catchy Sui Northern Gas Pipelines Ltd. Danish Kaneria took 8 for 59 against the Sui Southerners for Habib Bank, and then followed it up with 5 for 22. Shame he’s a Shotgun player.

In the West Indies domestic game, Gavin Wallace of Jamiaca, described as a leg break bowler, took 8 for 20 as the Leeward Islands were dismissed for 91 in St Kitts. That wasn’t mentioned in last week’s round-up…

So to player of the week. I think I’ll plump for a domestic cricketer. While the likes of JP Duminy, Muttiah Muralitharan and Albie Morkel played decent knocks this week, and Chris Gayle and Martin Guptill made eye-catching tons, to score two centuries in your tournament final is meritorious, so HDWLIA player of the week is Mumbai and India’s Rohit Sharma.

Ajantha Mendis is the man of the day, as he became, by four matches, the quickest bowler to 50 wickets in one day internationals. I have never actually seen him play, which is a great help, but if the stories are to be believed about this new spinning phenomenon, it seems Sri Lanka will be more able to replace their aging great twirler than Australia have proved to be with their’s. Sri Lanka posted what looks on paper to be a disappointing 210/6 in their 50 overs, and it appears they were rescued by a half-century for the very un-Sri Lankan sounding Angelo Mathews (he is born and bred in Colombo, before anyone looks it up) in his 4^th ODI.

Sri Lanka had a positive start, with a half-century opening stand, but fell away to 97/5 before Mathews, allied by Mubarak (31) and Thushara (28) got them past 200. Zimbabwe’s 80 included one batsman in double figures and extras top scoring with 16, which is all you really need to know about this hiding. Kulasekara took the first three wickets (finishing with 3/13), while Mendis (3/15) and Murali (2/4) did most of the rest in this mauling in Mirpur.

The Ranji Trophy Final started in Hyderabad today and Mumbai are batting first. The big two, Wasim Jaffer and Sachin Tendulkar contributed 1 run between them (Jaffer) having been stuck in by the home team (Uttar Pradesh). The runs came from two sources – Rohit Sharma, who on the occasions I’ve seen him, has looked an assured, class player, who is unbeaten on 113, and Abhishek Nayar, who was LBW for 99 to end his 207 partnership for the 5^th wicket after Mumbai fell to 55/4.

18 year-old Bhuvneshwar Kumar did the most damage. Listed as right arm medium on cricinfo, he took 5 of the 6 wickets to fall, including the vital dismissal of Tendulkar for a 15 ball duck caught at short mid-wicket off an inside edge. There were 4 LBW decisions on the day, as it appears Kumar in particular was getting the ball to cut back, while RP Singh’s wicket is described as a pretty poor decision.

Much rests on Rohit Sharma continuing his good performance (although his innings hasn’t been chanceless this far) and the experienced head of Ajit Agarkar (who my mate maintains is the worst test centurion ever at Lord’s). I would also imagine Zaheer Khan is awaiting his turn to bowl on this pitch, and he is slated to come in at 11, which suggests that those before him (we know Ramesh Powar can bat) are no muppets.

A quick summary then of the on-field events this weekend.

Australia captured the first of the two Twenty 20 matches with South Africa. I’ve commented on this in the posts below. David Warner has captured the Aussie imagination with some stupendous clean hitting, especially off Ntini and Steyn.

New Zealand had a record-setter in Martin Guptill. The 22 year old from Auckland made an unbeaten 122 in the New Zealand innings of the rain-affected match at Eden Park; a game that was ultimately ruined by the inclement weather meaning the series goes to a 5th game, with the match in Napier the series decider. For that game the Kiwis will have Jesse Ryder back in the fold, after his drinking exploits left him carrying the beverages for the 4th game.

In Bangladesh, the clash of the test titans went the way of Zimbabwe over the hosts. Bangladesh are a real odd bunch. They can turn over India and Australia in one dayers, but they are susceptible to the ravaged Zimbabweans. Elton Chigumbura was man of the match with 64, a wicket and a run out, as the visitors defended 205 by bowling out Bangladesh for 167 in Dhaka. Sri Lanka play Zimbabwe in the next game in this series tomorrow morning.

In India, almost forgotten opener, and scourge of England in 2006, Wasim Jaffer turned it on in the Ranji Semi-final with 301 in Mumbai’s mammoth first innings. Sachin Tendulkar added 122 as Mumbai proceeded into the final, where they will meet Uttar Pradesh (who beat Tamil Nadu on 1st innings). I note Wasim Jaffer also notched a ton in the quarter-final victory – a man pressing for a recall with nowhere to go while Gautem Gambhir is performing so well. The final starts tomorrow in Hyderabad.

Had a look at the latest game in the West Indies regional competition. It seems Guyana don’t have much strength in depth! Also with Chattergoon not really impressing in New Zealand, Devon Smith’s double ton when most around seemed to be struggling will give the Windies selectors a timely shove. Smith got a ton in the first innings in Jamaica in 2004 against England, and he may be the man coming out to open with Gayle next month.

I’ll try to review as much as I can at opportune moments in the cricket world for your delectation.